What Every Good Dad Remembers

Several years ago, a good friend of mine was grieving the loss of his father.  It was a sudden death; the kind you don’t anticipate. He wasn’t sick or suffering from any type critical illness. One day, his dad was alive; the next, he was gone.

My friend said to me, “I don’t feel I am ready to be the patriarch of the family.  But I am the only one left – so I guess it’s up to me now.”

The Bible has a lot to say about fathers.  There is no way in which I want to address all of it. I would like to however focus on three verses: 

Proverbs 3:11-13 (NIV) 11 My son, do not despise the Lord’s discipline and do not resent his rebuke, 12 because the Lord disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in. 13 Blessed is the man who finds wisdom, the man who gains understanding,

The implications of these verses can help us face up to who we are as dads.  These could be restated in this idea: The good dad is the one who is disciplined and disciplining.  Maybe the word disciplined doesn’t go down so well with some of us because of some harsh experiences.  I understand that, so allow me to unpack it further.  The good dad is the one who is always learning and leading.

There are six insights that undergird this idea:

1. Every father is also a child
The author addresses his words of counsel by saying “my son…” Let us never forget we are children no matter how old we get – you have a heavenly father.

2. As fathers who are children, we need continuing wisdom.
The large context of Proverbs 3 is our need for wisdom.  Is there any quality which gives more dignity to a father than wisdom?

3. Wisdom comes through the discipline of our heavenly father.
God is the source of wisdom. God has given us His word. He instructs us as to what it is to be His person.

4. God warns against two natural responses to His discipline.
We are warned not to resent his challenges, and we are warned not to despise His correction.

5. Only a father who delights in a child takes time to give adequate discipline.
God does not practice abusing his children. God’s discipline is not designed to knock us out. God gives loving instruction – His reproof emerges from a sensitive and deep care. He delights in His children.

6. The only person able to adequately discipline is one who lives responsibility under adequate discipline.
A responsible person must be accountable to someone. The father who knows best is subject to the Father who knows best. 

Fathering is never easy. Dads, you are in my prayers as we approach Father’s Day. Know our Father in heaven delights in us!  Happy Father’s Day!